I have a new card in play this year…..THE PREGNANT CARD. It took me a few months to really feel comfortable using this one but as I waited sheepishly in line after line, I was scolded by at least a dozen Parisian women (all over 50) who would look at me with the most scornful and pitiful look and say incredulously, “WHY ARE YOU WAITING IN LINE?????!!!” as if I was the dumbest person ever to grace the planet. I’d stutter out a “welllll…..uh…..I don’t know….I” to which they would respond “YOU ARE PREGNANT! YOU GO TO THE FRONT! IT’S YOUR RIGHT! IT’S THE LAW!” as if by standing in line, I was somehow messing up the rules for everyone else.

It took all of two times waltzing to the front of the grocery store line for me to realize….THIS ROCKS. I have four months left of this card, and goddamnit, I’m using every last one.

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