I like riding my bike. I don’t like body sacrifice, or even the threat of it. Hence, my idea of a good Paris bike ride is the Bois de Boulogne. On Sunday. When most of the streets are blocked off.

But just one word of caution. Should you choose to take a Velib or even your own two-wheeler into the Bois on a sunny Sunday morning, do not, I repeat, do not attempt to make a circuit on the long stretch of road around the Hippodrome de Longchamp.

Oh sure, it seems like a nice idea. There’s a bike lane and the surface is relatively flat. But all those other cyclists out circling the track? They’re not happy weekend bikers. No, that’s a peloton and those guys are Tour de France wannabes. They are serious and they hold no quarter with middle aged women and their somewhat erratic bikeriding children, something I learned the hard way. (Or maybe it had something to do with the concerned gentleman on the other side of the road frantically yelling “Madame, Madame” and flapping his arms at me.)